March

March: the month of Sandia hairstreaks, the vernal equinox -- and the second month I was sure Bullwinkle wouldn't live to see. For some reason, when he was diagnosed in January -- and in pretty bad shape -- it really bugged me that he wouldn't see the second month of 2010. So I'm surprised (and pleased) that he's made it into the third one.

We just returned from the cancer clinic. There's good news and bad news. The good news is that he definitely responded well to last week's chemo treatment -- the tumor got smaller. More good news is that the tumor hasn't grown into his jawbone at all, as they often do. The bad news is that the tumor has grown into his tongue -- and some of his tongue is necrotic (dead) and will fall off. On the plus side is the knowledge that kitties' tongues can get stronger with use, even if they have only partial tongues; on the minus side, though, is that most of his tongue is affected. He may never eat on his own again (however motivated he is). Dr. Kelly now guesses he has a 10% chance of remission -- down from 50% last week.

Bullwinkle definitely felt much better over the past week, so she's suggested chemo as palliative care for now. And my overriding goal is for him to be relatively happy and pain-free while he's alive -- so I consented to a second chemo treatment today. (I've now spent 1 1/2 months of my take-home pay just at the cancer clinic.)

But... Dr. Kelly said that when she saw him last week, Bullwinkle "was a dying kitty." She said he was so hypothermic then that his temperature didn't even register on the thermometer.